Writing like writers...Term 3 Wk 1

17/7/2015

Inspired by Tim Winton's Blueback (Chapter 1 p.5-6):

He fell back into the water with a cold crash. A cloud of bubbles swirled around him, clinging to his skin like pearls. Then he cleared his snorkel -phhht!-and rolled over to look down on the world underwater.

Great round boulders and dark cracks loomed below. Tiny silver fish hung in nervous schools. Seaweed trembled in the gentle current. Orange starfish and yellow plates of coral glowed from the deepest slopes where his mother was already gliding like a bird.

Abel loved being underwater.

5/6M give his style of writing a good go. Here is one we wrote together on the sensation of landing on the moon for the very first time.

She leapt off the lunar module, legs cramped from weeks of travel and orbit. Amazed at the weightless freedom, seemingly taking forever to land on cushioned soil. Sunlight glittered moon dust clouded the star littered sky. Om--the only sound that punctuated the vast silence; my breathing.

16 Comments

Ross :P

16/7/2015 05:45:57 am

Sky Diving

As he jumped off the plane , air breezing off his body -woosh!-,thinking that he was a falcon diving from the sky.As he realised that he was nearing the ground , he pulled out his parachute , slowly descending with a smile on his face.Niel felt special and would never forget this moment.

god son c.o.c. (ganes)

16/7/2015 05:52:29 am

Jumping off the space ship, weightless and tireness it has been 1 week to travel to Mars. my legs are weakened from sitting down too long. I took a step off the space ship -Tufff- sounded the ground. It was peace and quiet, all I can hear is my breathing and the sound of the steps I made.
The ground was empty and every time I took a step, dust begun to swirl around me. I took the flag and placed it on the ground -crack-. -beep!- said the ground. -beep- it said again -beep- -beep- -beep- -beep- (uh oh! I thought)

Gabstar and joleen

16/7/2015 05:58:42 am

She fell into the coral reef. A pod of bubbles surrounded her. A school of golden Platys swam elegantly around a substantial ship - wreck. There were turtle hiding in the seaweed. She was amazed with the underwater chaos and she couldn't believe how weightless she felt. The sun was illuminating the salty water.

Suddenly, she felt the deathly urge to breathe and swam rapidly to the surface. She had never been in a world like that before. She was desperate to do it many more times.🌅

whatever you want to call me (matthew)

16/7/2015 06:04:44 am

Jack,stepped slowly towards the lomming building , nerves overwhelming him, feeling weightless. Although the crowd was screaming and throwing popcorn his mind was not restricted to them The Chicago Bulls, just as taunting as their name were charging towards the middle of the court, his team Miame Heat. Trembling.. His heart beating like lightning. Thump. He entered the court... to be continued

savanna556

16/7/2015 06:08:30 am

Buntee jumping

Wow as i said looking at the view amazed how far down it appeared.
The sounnd of the helacopter going wosh wosh wosh-as it waiting for me to jump of the steep cliff and the feeling of the wind rushing thro my hair with a rope attached to me.

Summoner H

16/7/2015 06:16:15 am

Underwater

Hummm " I heared fanit voices yelling my name but I'm paraliyzed I looked at my seroundings , seaweed , fish and coral -- I'm underwater . I hit a grass bed it tickles my skin I remeber I was playing near the lake and i slipped and fell in then i ran my fingers down my neck i felt gills i look at my hands and feet their webed i can taste the sea salt i can feel my heart pounding in my ears. I can see a school of fish look at me they come closer they don't seem to be scared of me. They pick me up and we swim together going under rocks and feeling coral but the fish say i can't stay i have to go back to the surface they help me swim up there the moment i come out of the water my gills and webed feet disapeared i guess i'll have to keep this a secret.

Korallia

16/7/2015 06:23:46 am

Leaving the world
She leapt off the lunar module,legs camped from weeks of travel and orbit.Amazed at the sea freedom,seamingly taking forever to land on the pale ground.The moonlight glittering dust clouded the star sky.Me breathing.The vast silence I was scared to go,I had to go I went I was scared,annoyed,frightened,devastated,I thought to myself I can do this...

Avia Trotter (Karla)

16/7/2015 06:30:08 am

I drifted gracefully out of the space pod leaping out atempting to grab the earth. The dust glistend in front of me, blinding me with it's beauty, the only sound that entered my ears was my own calming breath.

NIKKI (I WISH MY MIDDLE NAME IS MEOW) NOROUZI

16/7/2015 06:45:01 am

The best holiday ever!

Kacey sprang out of the taxi and grabbed her luggage, skipping over to the hotel, she grined staring at the golden doors. she stepped forward and the doors swag open. Kacey asked the front desk for the card to get into her room. she patiently waited for the lift to come. Kacey ran out of the lift and stopped at her hotel door, she took a deep breath and opened her door. After an hour she started to feel weird, she heard whispers in her ear, she thought she just needed some air but when she tried to open the door, it was locked, she turned arouund... There was a knife floating infront of her, it flew as fast as a bullet. That was the end of Kacey.

Ben who is staring at you from the corner

16/7/2015 06:50:17 am

She leapt off the lunar module, legs cramped from weeks of travel and orbit. Amazed at the weightless freedom,seemingly taking forever to land on cushioned dust. Sunlight glittered dust clouded the star littered sky. -phht- the only sound that punctuated the vast silence, my breathing. As I raised my foot hitting the top of my suit with my foot, I could hear the slight sound of the moon. The howling made me anxious of what's beyond the dead moon.,what was under the moon. Is there life here? Feeling every more scared I ran to the module, counting my steps 1..2..3..4. I made it quickly collecting a piece of the moon. Then closing the module I closed my eyes again hoping to make it back to the ship.

bronagh

16/7/2015 06:50:44 am

She screadmed as the blood sprayed on the walls. She was terrified that it was her last day alive. She was held at gun point after her scream echoed through the silent building. Tears that driped into her mouth started to taste metalic, it was blood. Gun shoots powered past her eyes and she watched as they plunged into a guys chest. She tryed so hard not to scream, but that wasn't possible. "AHHHHHHHHHHHHH". Secons after sirens filled the air. Two men were shot,Attackers, one of them fell on her. His blood made it's way to her body. She leapt in the air, ran towards the door where police officers yelled at her to run. She ran into someones arms,a police officer, they told her assasins were after someone called Miah. Her body shut down after that lst word.Four words were exchanges from her,silently muffeled by her tears "My name is Miah".

Omar da. homie

16/7/2015 06:50:50 am

bungie jumping

When he walked off the cliff ,he had a shock. But he felt amazing, the air felt fresh on his face. the view was AMAZING, he saw the beutiful birds fly. He felt lonely. Is he alone?

ELLIE {who despretly needs ice-cream}

16/7/2015 06:52:39 am

"GO GO GO!" an unfimiluar voice screamed in fright. Adrenaline raced through my body like someone pushing me forward with extreme strenght."ARGHHH" the same vioce shreaked in agony his life had just been taken by these disgusting people who dont believe in our religion. Another rush of adrenaline raced through me keeping me within the group of screaming people sprinting through the dark streets. This was like a nature documentury WE were the gizzelles THEY were the lions.My mum grabbed my hand, Dad was close behind us ready to spint... even faster. "PUT YOUR WEAPONS DOWN" an extremly comforting voice demaded. I was an only child but my life still mattered, right? It will be okay only one persons been shot and it looked very minor" how could being shot be minor i thought agrily. Another scream of agony came from behind, stupidly, I looked back. An attacker had been shot. More adrenaline shot through me as i saw the army infront of us the whole groupof terrifien being ran passed the army into the museum that quickley went into lock down.

:B AVA

16/7/2015 07:00:37 am

As I stepped off the small, high platform, I felt like I was flying down as fast as a jet. My face felt like it was coming off. Bouncing up and down, back and forth in thin air. I never wanted to stop. I knew that I had to stop but I didn't. Before this very moment I thought that I couldn't do this but I did. I will never forget how awesome this was.

mike has a bozo

16/7/2015 07:04:35 am

As i leaped off the platform i had an adrenaline rush as i was free-falling and i could have passed out but i don't think i did it felt like a hour the first time it only took a couple minutes.I got cold and i thought i was going to hit the ground but in a blink of an eye i was flung back a couple of meters then i got higher and higher it was so fun and i got use to it. The adrenaline was crazy. As i was finishing off i wish it had dent i just couldn't get enough i really liked it i did it five or more times it was a good day.

Mackenzie

19/7/2015 12:19:49 pm

I really like your written guys. Miss you all at fort street how to visit you guys. And don't forget to keep writing like writers.😋

Your comment will be posted after it is approved.

for the love of learning

Writing like writers...Term 3 Wk 1

Leave a Reply.